2017 Happenings....

Well I blinked and we are already starting February. I swear the days fly by and the weeks go even faster. I cant believe how busy and eventful this first month of 2017 has been. I feel like so much information is constantly coming at Brian and I. Thank goodness he is much better equipped to absorb it all without becoming too overwhelmed. We have been working hard with all of Paxton's therapies and enjoying watching our three boys love (and sometimes hate) on each other.

baby buns are the best

Paxton has really grown this past month. Although he is still considered tiny and below average weighing in at only 10lbs 9.3oz at 4 months old hes done great growing considering all he's up against. Between being born a month early and his PWS diagnosis he is doing just fine in that area. We just continue to increase his feedings slowly but surely and since he has the G-button we can assure that he is getting the calories needed to continue to grow even when he doesn't have any interest in drinking orally. Bottle feeding continues to be his biggest struggle and ours too. Its so frustrating because we really don't know what magic trick is going to make him all of a sudden "get it" or want to drink by bottle. He is still doing some of his feedings with the bottle but majority of his milk still goes through the tube afterwards.

His littler personality is starting to really shine. He's been super smiley and happy these days. He is still a pretty laid back and chill child but we are now getting lots of smiles that are genuine (no longer random smiles that were most likely him passing gas lol). He can see us from farther away now and makes great eye contact. He loves staring into our eyes and "talking". The little sounds he makes now are seriously some of the cutest noises I have ever heard. Its so wonderful to hear any noise come out of him. When I think back to the first month he spent in the NICU and then our first month home after that we were constantly praying for him to make any noise at all. Now we hear them daily.....such a blessing!

earning his keep

Easton and Ben continue to be awesome big brothers. The first thing they ask every morning is "Where is Paxton" and they run (and fight eachother to be first) to see him, kiss on him, and talk to him before they leave for daycare. They are so sweet with him. Ben is constantly saying the most hilarious things to him. "Paxton I love you soooo much.....I'm going to throw a water balloon on your head" UM WHAT! hahahha...just this morning I held Paxton down to Ben's level and he hugged him and goes "I love you Paxton. I'm a big boy so I can hold you" Easton does great with helping us get things for Paxton or holding/watching him if I have to run upstairs for a second. Easton is also obsessed with earning money these days (no idea what his purchase plans are for all these pennies he is earning lol) so we are putting him to work washing dishes, dusting, and cleaning up toys. Not going to lie I'm really liking this new helpful child. there is this poem that talks about the last time for things with your child (Ill copy the poem at the end of this post). I find myself sadly already experiencing those things with Easton lately. The other week Brian was traveling and Easton fell asleep on the couch. I went to pick him up to carry him to bed (my bed as I LOVE snuggling with him when I have a half empty bed). I could barely carry him and it was the most awkward attempt to bring him upstairs.....I couldn't believe it! I swear the last time I carried him it was effortless and easy.....it tears at my heart a bit to think that soon I wont even be able to do it at all. Now we all know about mom strength and how when we need to move mountains we somehow can muster the strength regardless of weight and size, but I am now faced with the reality that he truly is growing up and being able to carry him, hold him on my lap, and him needing me for every little thing is ending. Now with that sadness also comes pride, happiness, and so much joy. I love watching him cheer on his brothers, love so intensely, and be so compassionate to every living thing. I love that he wants to learn literally everything he can and tell me about his days. I love that we can go and do so many more things together now that he is older and have real conversations about things. This whole parenting thing is a rollercoaster ride that's for sure.

future photographer? 

Paxton started on his growth hormone shots. Crazy that I am now giving shots daily, but Brian and I have gotten comfortable doing them. I think knowing and now seeing how much they help him makes it not as scary. He is so tough and barely cries. He is also getting a HCG treatment for five weeks which also includes a shot. This one is bigger but only twice a week, and like I said will only last for five weeks. Currently he only has 3 shots left. Lucky for me, my mother in law is a nurse so she has been kind enough to come over to give those to him every Tuesday and Saturday. I know it breaks her heart to see him cry, but we give her lots of time to snuggle him afterwards. Again, this kid is the strongest human I know. He is over the pain in a quick minute and back to his wiggly smiley self immediately. Makes us adults who carry on about paper cuts and sore musecles for days seem pretty wussy.

helping with Paxtons GH shot

brotherly love

Like I said before the GH shots have really been helping Paxton. His head and neck strength has greatly improved in the last couple weeks. Since we work with him everyday its hard for us to really see the changes, but having his physical therapist who only sees him once a week comment and remind me how far he has come helps. We are so proud of the fighter that Paxton is. He has taught us so much about resiliency in such a short time.

As we approach Benjamin's 3rd birthday we have started the process of potty training. Not gunna lie I have been putting this off and dreading it. It was a complete nightmare with Easton and Ben has never done anything easy or willingly so I figured we'd just keep doing diapers until kindergarten lol. Of course we have Mary Pat to get us back on track. She thought he was ready despite him always refusing to visit the potty chair at our house. We got him pack of ninja turtle undies and he was psyched to start. Brian and I took a trip to Florida last week with Paxton so the boys stayed at my in laws. Benjamin actually took a poop in the big potty at their house and was SO PROUD of himself. Easton got so excited for him too and couldn't wait to tell Mary Pat and all their friends at daycare about it the next day. We are slowly making progress. He's still in diapers but we talk about it more and have days where we do the undies. I'm sure it will happen like it did with Easton...he will decide he's ready and that will be that. Luckily with kid #2 you tend to not stress about it as much and to be quite honest after everything we have been through and are going through with Paxton we realized that worrying/stressing just takes too much energy. One day at a time....one poop at a time!

and it begins.....

big boy undies

Easton being his cheerleader

Like I said Paxton, Brian, and I flew to Florida last week for a quick 48 hours. Brian had business and I needed to see some sunshine. Gearing up for a trip was quite the ordeal. Between Paxton's unique feeding needs, oxygen machine for nighttime, and my pumping supplies there was A LOT! We made it work and learned how to do it easier for the next time....because there are many trips coming up for the three of us.

so fancy

airplane fun! 

post bath smiles

when daddy travels we do living room picnics

sometimes the only way I can shower. Ben needed to do playdoh in the bathroom while I showered.

best buds

4 months young! 

We are getting ready for a trip to KC which I couldn't be more excited about. Being with my brother and his family is my favorite! The boys are so excited to go to KC and stay at a hotel. I am excited to see my brother, sister in law, and their two perfect kiddos and just spend time with them. You wouldn't think a road trip that involved being with my three kids on top of two extra kids would be relaxing but somehow it always is. Family is everything and I always feel recharged after time spent with them. I'm sure I will have lots of fun stories to share after our weekend of cousin/family time. Until then take care and God Bless. As promised below is the poem I was referencing.....get the tissues out:

The Last Time

From the moment you hold your baby in your arms,
you will never be the same.
You might long for the person you were before,
When you have freedom and time,
And nothing in particular to worry about.

You will know tiredness like you never knew it before,
And days will run into days that are exactly the same,
Full of feedings and burping,
Nappy changes and crying,
Whining and fighting,
Naps or a lack of naps,
It might seem like a never-ending cycle.

But don’t forget …
There is a last time for everything.
There will come a time when you will feed
your baby for the very last time.
They will fall asleep on you after a long day
And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child.
One day you will carry them on your hip then set them down,
And never pick them up that way again.
You will scrub their hair in the bath one night
And from that day on they will want to bathe alone.
They will hold your hand to cross the road,
Then never reach for it again.
They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles,
And it will be the last night you ever wake to this.
One afternoon you will sing “the wheels on the bus”
and do all the actions,
Then never sing them that song again.
They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate,
The next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone.
You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face.
They will run to you with arms raised for the very last time.
The thing is, you won’t even know it’s the last time
Until there are no more times.
And even then, it will take you a while to realize.
So while you are living in these times,
remember there are only so many of them
and when they are gone, you will yearn for just one more day of them.
For one last time.
-Author Unknown-